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Posts Tagged ‘divorce

The New Year offers endless possibilities to set new goals and break bad habits. How about starting new couple habits that will strengthen your relationship?, says Dr. Noelle Nelson, relationship expert and author of Your Man is Wonderful (Free Press, 2009).
 
“Now is the time to take a look at some of ‘him-and-her’ patterns developed over the years. Keep those that work and change those that don’t,” says Nelson. “You know the ones, like the roll-your-eyes-snide-comment thing you do every time your husband laughs at what you consider to be some inane sitcom gag. Or your severe sigh and heavily judgmental, ‘I don’t want to talk about it’ way of ending arguments.”
 
These all worked to get your point across at some point in the relationship. “We don’t establish patterns because they will fail. Him-and-her patterns emerge because they work,” explains Nelson. “When you were first together, letting him know your opinion of a sitcom with a roll-eyes-snide-comment was cute. It certainly was more acceptable than saying something downright demeaning. But over time, it’s not cute, and in fact, can be downright irritating.”
 
In this example, Nelson points out that for the husband, watching sitcoms may relax him; take him away from a world of worry and responsibility. “Instead of rolling your eyes when he turns on his favorite show, accept the good that watching does for him,” says Nelson. “Don’t react negatively. Better yet, smile, knowing the show is of value to him.”
 
An “I don’t want to talk about it” pattern may have kept you from flying into a temper during an argument in the past, but now all it does is prevent you from discussing issues that need to be discussed if your relationship is to deepen and thrive. “Change that pattern to ‘I need some time to cool down. Let’s come back to it later. Is that okay?,” says Nelson. “That way, you can handle your heated emotions without dropping an issue that will only continue to fester if left unaddressed.
 
“We have patterns of behavior for all types of situations, continues Noelle. “We couldn’t function in our highly complex world if we didn’t have reliable patterns to go by. But left unexamined, our patterns can become a prison, keeping us locked in behaviors that no longer contribute to a happy, joyful life.”
 
Nelson suggestions that this New Year, take a fresh look at your him-and-her patterns. “Keep the ones that work,” she says, “and let go of the ones that don’t. With new patterns, you’ll see a surge of love and a stronger bond between the two of you.”
 
For more marriage tips, go to Nelson’s blog, http://anotefromdrnoelle.blogspot.com/ or follow her on Twitter, http://twitter.com/drnoellenelson.

brandi-glanville-leann-rimes-eddie divorseAfter months of rumor about his alleged affair with LeAnn Rimes, Eddie Cibrian has just filed for divorce from his wife Brandi Glanville.  On Monday the couple officially entered divorce proceedings and according to Brandi, the decision makes both her and Eddie quite “happy.”

Apparently, Eddie pushed for the dissolvement to plan a romantic getaway with LeAnn.  Brandi said: “They’re going on vacation this weekend to Mexico. I’m looking forward to seeing those pictures.”

Drama!

Wendy Touton, George David and Marie David

Wendy Touton, George David and Marie David

Yesterday 67-year-old United Technologies chairman George David, whose 37-year-old wife is demanding approximately a third of his fortune, took the stand in Hartford Family Court answering questions about purchases of lingerie  for his mistress, Wendy Touton.

But apparently the wife, Marie Douglas-David, is the one who wants out.  After seven years of marriage she wants a $99 million settlement despite a 2005 post-nuptial agreement she says she signed under duress.

“I married a very controlling person,” the Swedish countess said in a phone interview with The Courant about her on-again, off-again marriage that began unraveling two years after their 2002 wedding.

“I’m not mad at him,” she said, insisting she is not bitter. “But I feel sorry for him. It’s not an elegant way to divorce.”

$99 million?  Why not make it a cool 100?  Maybe that’s asking a little too much.  Either way it’s more than $14 million per year she was married to George David.

Hayley Glassman, Jon GosselinDrama just follows the Gosselin clan.  Less than three weeks after wife Kate Gosselin filed for divorce, Jon showed off a new girlfriend during a trip to St. Tropez on Saturday.  Here’s the kicker…his new girlfriend is the daughter of the doctor who performed Kate’s tummy tuck!!

The 32-year-old father of eight traveled to the South of France with 22-year-old girlfriend Hailey Glassman.  The couple were seen smoking cigarettes and holding hands while in the French Riviera, where they also took a ride on fashion designer Christian Audigier’s yacht (which explains Jon’s Ed Hardy shirt).

What happened to Jon’s other woman in question, 23-year-old Deanna Hummel?  Even after news broke of Gosselin’s alleged affair with the school teacher, the couple continued to see each other, as well as take a snowboarding vacation to Utah in March.  Geez the guy moves fast!

Are Jon and Kate announcing their divorce on the upcoming one-hour episode of Jon and Kate Plust Eight?  Or are they just teasing us?  Maybe the announcement isn’t a divorce…maybe Kate’s pregnant again!  To find out, tune-in to TLC on Monday, June 22 at 9 p.m. eastern.

jon and kate plus eight divorceDivorce rates are still almost 50 percent and yet millions of people each year enter into marriage without learning the communication skills needed to navigate through the trials and tribulations of life as a couple. On the reality show “Jon and Kate Plus 8,” Americans have witnessed first hand the struggles of their marriage.

Jon and Kate are like many couples who experience the difficulties of daily life and struggle to keep their marriage together. The California Healthy Marriages Coalition (CHMC) has released data showing Americans now have the ability to navigate those difficult times and increase marital happiness through Marriage Education.

CHMC President Dennis Stoica says, “In order to change the landscape of divorce in America, we need to address the underlying problem of communication breakdown that is so common when couples don’t learn effective communication skills. We now have convincing evidence that Marriage Education programs really help couples improve their relationships.” Stoica adds, “If we could reach high visibility couples like Jon and Kate with these communication skills, that would be exciting!”

In order to change the divorce statistics, CHMC says it’s important that couples recognize the benefits of staying together through the tough times and the skills for doing that. Numerous studies have shown that there is an inescapable connection between divorce and undesirable outcomes for the children of those relationships, including negative impact on their mental and physical health and educational decline. This week, CHMC released preliminary data showing the impact of Marriage Education classes taught in California. Couples who took a CHMC-sponsored Marriage Education course showed an average improvement of 19 percent in marital satisfaction, problem-solving skills, and relationship skills.

Stoica said, “When we teach couples skills that get them through the rough patches successfully, then families stay together and their children benefit in a multitude of ways. Marriage Education has the potential to make a dramatic difference in reducing divorce and family breakdown.”


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